Of possibly the craziest thing I'll ever do in my life

Some of you may know me personally. Okay, maybe not. In fact, I don't even think my closest friends read this blog.....Guess that's my fault for not really updating......So anyway! The few of you who do know me, probably know how I rant on and on about going to a US college once I graduate high school. "I wanna go to the US! I wanna go to the US! I wanna go to the US!"

There's just one problem. Living in Brunei means we don't take SATs here. At least, not the normal people. We take O levels, A levels, hope we get kick-ass results and pray like mad to whatever deity we believe in that we get admitted into a UK/Aus/NZ college. Some of us less well-to-do kids gotta pray uber hard for a scholarship too. So taking SATs meant I had to ask my parents for funding. That was months ago. Possibly a year. -shrugs- A few days back, they said I could take it if I would fund myself. This is a big thing for me okay. I've almost never truly paid for anything I wanted out of my own pocket. Yes, I'm spoiled that way. Normally, I'd just look at something I wanted and the decision of whether or not I should get it is calculated from whether or not my parents would get it for me. If they won't I won't even waste my time and energy asking for it. Of course, when they said I could take it if I would fund myself, I totally realize that in the long run, my parents might end up forking out the funding I need to prepare myself for the SATs and the exam, but I think I'll still be okay even if they really meant it. Like, some people say that you shouldn't just pray, you should show your deity how much you want something. And this is me, saying, "I really wanna go to the US."

So once we get over the SAT part, we have to think of that other thing in the college application that could cause teenage suicide count to increase. The essay. My brother had an awesome beginning to his essay. Like, 'Whoah, I never thought of that.' And I'm reading about the application and admission for Yale and MIT. I'm going, 'Oh my goodness, am I really going to do this? Really?' It looks daunting, with words like, "competitive", "passion", "activities".

I admit, I'm scared. I'm asking myself if I'm crazy. No particular passion for virology (but quite frankly I don't want to do anything else), no particularly awesome achievements (really, what Asian kid doesn't have straight As, a piano/violin diploma, proficiency in over five languages, enough certificates to use as wallpaper and crazy parents?), no nuclear reactor in my garage built by me when I was twelve.But if I want to go to a US college, I have to get through this. Preferably without wetting my pants. I've done a lot of crazy things in my life. This would probably rank as #1.